Kingsman: The Secret Service (2014)

Kingsman: The Secret Service

Director: Matthew Vaughn
Writers: Mark Millar (Graphic Novel)
                Jane Goldman and Matthew Vaughn (Screenplay)
Duration: 129 minutes (including after credits scene)
Starring: England’s Finest Knights and Samuel L. Jackson

Layers over layer over a cake so sweet and delicious… you shall not miss this year’s perfect Valentine day… it will heal the world cure the planet and save millions of souls, from that wretched sadistic Grey boy playing with girls and toys in theatres next door…. This movie kicks ass and gives it to the spy world up the ass hole….

Taron Egerton stands tall next to Collin Firth, Mark Strong, Samuel L. Jackson, Michael Caine and yes Luke Skywalker Mark Hamill…

This is Matthew Vaughn and Mark Millar playing around with politics, guns for toys, blades for legs, crackers for splatter and a hell lot of things that might sound absurd but look magnificently Knight worthy… storm troopers in an icicle, nuns playing with bums, and the world on mobile phones…. Tarantino might have set a line in Killing Bill and Takashi Miike might have had audience’s split in half, but oh my the balls on this movie combines all of humanity behind a flawless orchestra of mash ups…

No more words to be used about her majesties service or sir Lancelot king Richard and his knights are very well presented in one of the best adaptations since Hit Girl joined forces with Kick Ass…

Cause this movie Kicks ass indifferently and leaves you with an everlasting smile, even if you tend to puke at the very sight of blood… you would do so with a thrill in your belly…

But in case you are searching for the next James Bond…. Well “this is not that kind of movie bruv…”

Daffy Meter: 9.5/10
Metacscore: 58/100 but what do they know… they thought it was Bond… but it’s King Arthur bitches…